| Saying goodbye to my guilty pleasure |
[25 Apr 2008|04:26pm] |
It's the best thing for me, though we had amazing times. On to another, maybe deeper connection.
I am happy
That I have you
Even though you're not here now
I know somewhere
You are dreaming
Though it's definitely not of me
It doesn't matter
If this all shatters
Nothing lasts forever
I am warmed by
Your friendship
Even when you're far away
And I'm happy
In the knowledge
We may never see the day
When I kiss you
And you kiss me
Don't pretend you miss me
The worst kind
Of diseased mind
Is one filled with jealousy
If we should meet again
Don't try to solve the puzzle
Just lay down next to me
And please don't move a muscle
I will thank you
Most of all for
The respect you have for me
I'm embarrassed
It overwhelms me
Because I don't deserve any
It doesn't matter
If this all shatters
Nothing lasts forever
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| I just can't quit you...... |
[22 Aug 2007|10:34am] |
I don't want to touch
your skin anymore
I don't want your cologne to linger
While you walk through the door
I don't want to see your eyes
glimmer for me
And I don't want to be in debt
To you're ecstasy
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| ~Famished~ |
[22 Jun 2007|04:34pm] |
The game has begun
Vanishing kisses and cheap wine
The certainty of safety
The yearning of the next sinful wake
The still of the bedroom walls
Speaking through my mind
Words like velvet
Soft yet stunning
Waiting on the brush
Of your gentle fingers
Across the soft of my jawline
Like a fein
Craving your satisfaction
Opposing my opposition
Consuming the still
This night has to offer
With thoughts of the next minute
Of luxiourious gratifying
Famished delight
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[25 Jun 2006|12:57pm] |
Simply necessary,
indulging distraction
As I leave my mind with a retraction
Don't stop kissing me like that
Obsession grows in a breath
The very breath we shared
The look of denial
Please stay for a while
And don't stop kissing me like that
When you hold me tight
Shoulder to shoulder
Your hands getting bolder
Simply obsessively right
Making me want to be with you tonight
And don't stop kissing me like that
Anyone that can make me shiver
I tend to keep
A touch to a thrill
A chase to a kill
A feeling to a want
A want to a need
Obsession turned to greed
Please stop
And Don't stop kissing me like that
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| San Francisco! |
[08 Jun 2006|04:17pm] |
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Work is sending me to SF next week for a whole week! yay! putting me up at the Marriott! This time I don't have to worry about being there lonely with a boyfriend that doesn't want to see me. And now I went from someone who barely wants to talk on the phone to someone who won't stop calling me! Seriously on my jock but who knows what will happen with that little project. It'll kind of be nice to have some alone time next week. I neeed to clear my head and stuffs. Maybe I'll take the Bart into the city. I can't believe it's going to be the fourth of july soon. I don't know what I'm planning. The year went by really fast, but at least I'm moving along with it. I think it's time to schedule a vegas trip also...That is all.
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[23 Jan 2006|10:23pm] |
Fun and relaxing weekend. Lorrette invited me over her house to chill and spend the night. I stayed there for two nights because we were having fun relaxing and chilling. Shadi came over cuz he was hanging out w/ Amar. Felt like old times hanging out w/ him. We were supposed to go to Universal Studios the next day but we ended up drinking and hanging out talking all night till 6am. Amar drove us to Walmart to get some things and I almost got kicked out for dancing w/ a cardboard cutout of a football player. haha. Pero anyways, we finally went to universal studios today. I've been dying to go on the tour for a while now. It was awesome, but ofcourse not as cool as when I was a kid. I'm glad to know that they left a lot of old school stuff there like king kong, and the flood thing. I had the funnest time there as a kid. I miss disneyland too. good times good times, i'm exhausted got a lot of homework this week.
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| Should I sell my soul? |
[20 Dec 2005|05:25pm] |
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So I'm thinking...what the hell should i do w/ my life. Then my mom offered..."why don't you move back in and save up money to buy a condo, we won't charge you rent." Nooowwwww she got me thinking. Should I sell my soul? hmmmmm if i save the money up I pay for rent each month, by the end of the year I'll have 5,000. 2 years 10,000. and so on and so on....bam theres money for a downpayment. But can i move back home? I haven't decided yet! Tough decision. It's been about a week and a half now since Saif and I broke up. I"m still kinda sad over it. I miss him a lot already. and WHyYy do I miss someone who obviously doesn't want to hear my voice? I do not know. I"m still confused about this and confused about myself. I don't know if our paths will cross again,that's not up to me, maybe God, but I think I miss his friendship more than anything. But I guess, as it seems he has, I need to move on and let life happen, focus on myself....
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[05 Nov 2005|02:49pm] |
Time
Like a backround
Painting like melodys
Laughing with fate
Your words like serendipity
crawling at me through
Time
Bringing shadowed memories
Sprinkling in my mind
Traveling through my veins
I try and forget you
yet again obeying
Time
silenced with meloncholy
Hiding through empathy
a million years
in your smile
silenced and frozen
echoeing in whispers
mirrored by strangers
a million voices
of a memory
a million words
dormat in
Time
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[05 Nov 2005|12:34am] |
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ughhhhh! I'm so confused. I heard from a coworker who heard from one of the head honchos that our company may not be around for longer than a year. I hope that is just gossip and not true but who knows. Credible sources. I'm not surprised, however, it's stressing me out. What do I do now? I know that I'm going to try and learn more. But I have to have a plan B. I refuse to move back home (unless I get engaged, which I hope to be sometime next year), but other than that I don't want to!!! That is the only way I would move back home. But hopefully the company will allow enough time to look for another job. Insurance is getting really boring to me, but it's good money and I have some experience now so fuck it. I want to win the lotto. Being responsible and paying bills sucks.
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[19 Oct 2005|08:33pm] |
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My little pumpkin head!!!
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[17 Oct 2005|08:19pm] |
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My new mission is to try and disconnect myself from my feelings for right now. Is that even possible? hmmmmm
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twilightgdn's journal
